Whatever you do during the emotional time of a pending divorce is in the spotlight, and your actions will be on center stage. Emotions are running wild, and both of you are completely hurt and vulnerable, and it is important to try and keep a level head during divorce. Not many people realize that even the smallest of actions can turn into the battle of the decade when you are going through a divorce. For example, taking large furniture out of the marital home, that you no longer live in, without prior agreement with the other party can be completely blown out of proportion. This may seem like a small and reasonable thing to do, but you won’t know how disturbingly twisted the story will come across from the other party’s point of view.
Don’t fool yourself by saying “they would never say that about me” or “they would never do that to me” because I have seen too many people get hurt under that false assumption. Divorce can bring out a completely different breed of character from the person you thought you have known for years. It may even bring out a new side in yourself that could get you into trouble.
To avoid unnecessary arguments and to stay out of trouble, remember to keep your emotionally charged behaviors in check. You may be the most even keel, down-to-earth, and mundane personality known to man, but the emotional weight of a divorce can swing any reasonable person to the other side. It is not uncommon for the sadness and overwhelming emotions of divorce to lead to heavy drinking and other unhealthy choices. Even the relief of being released from domestic captivity can lead to unusually wild behavior.
Whatever you are feeling, be sure to check yourself and monitor your behavior to make sure that you are not behaving unusually. Examples include bad mouthing your ex to your kids, getting a DUI, and having promiscuous relationships. These situations of acting out in the moment can end up hurting you down the road, and can lead to even bigger issues outside of your divorce. Stay in control, levelheaded, and be careful to not let yourself turn every one of your ex’s actions into a bigger deal than it really is.
Lastly, beware of traps set up to provoke you into acting out in unusual, but nonetheless unsavory, behavior that can be used against you. You may be the best parent in the world and have written a top-selling parenting book, but it only takes one wrong move to disintegrate your parental reputation. So it is best to play it safe and know that your life will soon find a “new normal”, but now is the time to just get through your divorce with your head held high.
For more legal help during this time of need, call Katie Crow at (334) 737-3733.
Katie Crow is a family law and divorce attorney located in Opelika, Alabama. Katie also practices in the surrounding areas of Auburn in Lee County, Chambers, Macon, Russell, and Tallapoosa counties in Alabama striving to help her clients with their legal needs. Katie specializes in areas concerning divorce, child custody and parental rights, adoption, modifications, child support, paternity, and other legal services.